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The Whole Sun Balancing Upon My Knees

by Shealeigh

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1.
Don't Say It 02:46
In the lobby I am lonely In the front seat I am floating Out of sight Out of mind In my own dreams Don't say it Don't say it Don't say it yet Everything changes I don't wanna be afraid of it But it's moving faster And you're moving farther Don't say it Don't say it Don't say it yet Don't say it Don't say it Right before the light changes In the dark, I'll be your favorite In the dark, I'll be your favorite Oh, this is how we end tonight Saving all the best soundbites 'Cause we don't wanna move And we don't wanna fight When the morning comes, it'll be all right If you don't say it Don't say it Don't say it yet If you don't say it yet
2.
Real Person 03:00
You asked me to come here Sit in a cold bar She's a menace She's a superstar Aren't we the anti-heroes That we're all afraid to talk about Does that freak you out I wanna feel like a real person To you and everyone else in the world I feel like I'm on the nightly news as The lonely, not-so-genius girl And none of my friends ever tell me They watch me age And they all speed up I got a feeling this is all a part of it I have a feeling this is how you'd write it I wanna feel like a real person You asked me to come here Meet somewhere in between She is selfish She's a fever dream Aren't we the villains That we're so ashamed to write about Does that freak you out I wanna feel like a real person To you and everyone else in the world I feel like I'm on the nightly news as The lonely, not-so-genius girl And none of my friends ever tell me They watch me age And they all speed up I got a feeling this is all a part of it I have a feeling this is how you'd write it I wanna feel like a real person And you can't look me in the eye this time A couple blocks and a bottle of cheap wine Yeah, I am different 'Cause I waited for a sign The psychic said that I wanna feel alive I wanna feel like a real person To you and everyone else in the world I feel like I'm on the nightly news as The lonely, not-so-genius girl And none of my friends ever tell me They watch me age And they all speed up I got a feeling this is all a part of it I have a feeling this is how you'd write it If only you'd ever really write I know that we can be a bit obsessive I wanna feel like a real person
3.
Ben's Song 03:20
My brother has the hair I've always wanted We fought about When he cut it off For a contest He tells me I'm too serious And I agree with him From our lips to God's voicemail Guess He must be out again I don't mean to sound indifferent I just changed more than I ever wanted to And if I retrace my steps My knees hurt And these new meds make me sad Make my hands burn And if I can't tell you I'm good Then I feel worse I used to sleep through the night I met three girls named Claire When I transferred colleges We all hate what we write When it's honest And the lady across the street Hands out pages of the bible Says we're all going to hell 'Cause we watch American Idol I told her I was already there And it's no Apocalypse From our lips to God's voicemail Guess He hates when I'm like this I don't mean to sound indifferent I just changed more than I ever wanted to And if I retrace my steps My knees hurt And these new meds make me sad Make my hands burn And if I can't tell you I'm good Then I feel worse I used to sleep through the night I used to drive and go out But it's snowing way too hard now I'm back home Ben lives somewhere else now And I still don't wanna let myself down I don't mean to sound indifferent I just changed more than I ever wanted to And if I retrace my steps My knees hurt And these new meds make me sad Make my hands burn And if I tell you I'm bad Then I feel worse I used to sleep through the night
4.
Here Again 02:49
Swaying back and forth In mid-July When the wind feels like a guest of mine I share my secrets in your car's backseat The whole sun balancing upon my knees I am here again Sitting on my coat On red, velvet seats This room was built to wrap its arms around me Lay in the garden Like a rag doll, baby I spent my whole summer Like a rag doll, baby I am here again I am here again In the morning Before the city gets loud You say you're only empty pieces of sound Yeah, in my head, I made a lot of mistakes None of the ones you seem to think I made You haven't missed me Like I missed me, I bet You're talking backwards Just to get to the end But I am here again Here again I'm here, I'm here I'm here again Here again I'm here, I'm here I'm here again Here again I'm here, I'm here

credits

released February 25, 2022

music & lyrics by shealeigh
produced by shealeigh

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Shealeigh Chicago, Illinois

23-year-old singer/songwriter

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